Crazy Dreams

So lately I have had some CRAZY dreams. Even before I was pregnant I had very vivid dreams, but I am at the point where I dream, wake up, and have to convince myself that it didn't just happen.

I think that relazation of having this baby is playing over and over in my head. I go to the doctor on Wednesday to figure out what the plan is if this sweet baby is still breech. I can pretty much tell you that she still is... she is comfy and not movin!

Last night I dreamt that David and I went to my 33 week visit (coming up on Wednesday). During the visit the nurse did her normal blood pressure, urine, weight, and how are you feeling check. Then she told me that it was time to have the baby! All I could think of was that I was only 33 weeks and I couldn't have the baby yet. Nothing in her room was ready and I didn't even have a hospital bag packed. NOT AN OPTION! But... in my dream we called our parents. They all came when we were in the hospital room. The nurse had decided that it was going to be a c-section. (No doctor even came into the room). I was freaking out! They led me to the operating table and only my mom came with me. I kept asking for David and he was hiding in the hospital room... freaking out himself. My mom just kept shouting "This baby is 33 weeks... she is not coming yet!" I was telling the nurse over and over... her lungs aren't finished developing, her brain isn't finished growing, and WE are NOT ready for this baby! Finally, I woke myself up from the dream. It was so scary.... so all morning long I have been organizing her room, making a list of what we haven't gotten, and thinking of all the things I need to pack in the hospital bag. I guess this is the true form of nesting.

I know that God has a plan, but I think the relazation of having the baby is the scary part. I am not scared to carry her to term or a little before or after.... I am not scared to hold this precious angel in my arms once she is here... but having her scares me to death! I know that many women have done it, and many will continue to do it, but I just have a nervousness about me when I think about delivering a baby. I just pray that everything is safe and there are LOTS of drugs!